When to say I love you? Falling in love can be likened to a lot of different things, probably because falling for someone is a different experience for every person. Some people compare falling in love to getting hit between the eyeballs by a very large baseball bat. For others, love sneaks up on them like a small, furry pooch with very sharp teeth that slinks up behind them to bite them on the butt. Yet others compare it to various forces of nature that tend to start out slow but build momentum unstoppable until it pretty much crashes down on them like a tsunami. But still the big question is how and when to say I love you.
Regardless of HOW you tend to fall in love, one of the most difficult things about it is undoubtedly trying to figure out WHEN to tell the girl you’ve fallen in love with the three simple words “I Love You”. It’s difficult to decide when to say I love you. This simple and seemingly harmless phrase carries with it a wealth of emotions, ranging from ecstatic hopefulness to abject terror. Here are a few tips to help you determine when you to say I love you to someone and NOT get your emotional tail kicked as a result.
First things first: examine your feelings. Before saying anything, and to know when to say I love you, be sure you’re in love with your prospective partner. Admittedly love can be construed a lot of ways, but generally we ALL want to find someone that we can spend the rest of our lives with. So first things first, are you just after a quick romp in the sack, or are you after something a bit more meaningful? If sex is all you’re after, don’t even bother talking about love. You can say the words, but when you say I love you without sincerity, they won’t be honest and most girls are sharp enough to know bovine manure when they spot it. On the other hand, if you think that you can stand to wake up to your potential partner’s face every morning, can put up with her little foibles and irritating habits without going berserk, and if you think that you’ll wind up having this aching empty spot in your heart if you lose her for good, THEN you can tell her you love her with more sincerity. This is when you say I love you and you know it feels right and you mean it from the bottom of your heart.
Now, aside from YOUR feelings, also examine her feelings. When you say I love you it’s not just your feelings that you have to consider. Granted this is much, much, much more difficult to do than to say. Girls are past masters at masking their emotions behind deadpan expressions and knowing looks. I’m sure you know the “looks” I’m talking about… but thankfully, there are at least a few simple indicators that you can rely on as clues to whether your feelings are one sided or mutual and hints when to say I love you. Laughter and smiles are one of the simplest clues. Make a girl laugh and she MIGHT like you. Another indicator is conversation. IF all your talks are one sided, you can usually forget about it. Big hint here: girls LOVE to talk. If your girl is clamming up, it means something is wrong somewhere. Smiles and conversation aside, a third indicator is time spent together. No girl would spend large amounts of time with you unless she enjoys your company. This MIGHT also mean that she regards you as a friend and not a potential hubby, but let’s face it; the BEST marriages start out as friendships.
Now, the final tip is probably going to be either the easiest thing in the world for you to do, or the toughest, depending on how you think. The question of WHEN to say I love you to her is a mind boggling experience for people who like to plan things out in advance. You see, love isn’t logical, and trying to apply logic to it with things like planning a date with a perfect setting, romantic candles, etc., etc., etc., will often lead to a case of emotional hemorrhoids. Take my advice on this: if you love a girl, don’t bother trying to think of WHEN you should tell her or when to say I love you. Keep it business as usual, go out, keep her company, and have fun. Then, in the middle of all that, you will know when to say I love you, there will come a point, when she will say or do one of those things that endear her to you so much, and you’ll feel all warm and fuzzy but comfortable around her. Then at that point, just TELL her. The sheer spontaneity of it, combined with your heart most likely being in your eyes when you say I love you, will make a bigger impact on her than a planned scenario.
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